End of An Era

A lot has happened since that fateful day in 2007 when I said fuck it.

No really knows that I went through three different frame of mind changes since that day. On that very day in question was the first change where I went from very nervous and scared Devon, to the Devon who eventually went by the motto: "the worst thing that can happen is death and if it gets to that point then God was calling me home well before then". I know that a lot of people will see that and think of every negative thing under the sun about me. Well they should know that one thing that I was born with was the gift of discernment; so, while I was out there being reckless to the extreme, it was always at a bit of caution for my personal well-being. But for the most part I was out here being extra and having a fantastic time with all of my friends. It was basically one of the best times of my life, and I learned a lot of lessons during this time.

The second time was when I left for the military and had to change my whole mindset so that racists, the unhappy, chicken heads and any other unhappy person wouldn't tear me down in the process of me bettering myself. There are three kinds of opinion about the military, with the first being that it's the greatest thing ever. These are the type of opinions that are detrimental to most soldiers who feel external pressures to stay in and make the best of a shitty situation from people who don't know what success is or that there are other roads to said destination. This was the big view that I had to euro step the whole-time I was in. Folks constantly telling me that I needed the Army to be the best version of me, when in reality I could make way more money outside of it with a basic 9-5 job.

The vacation days are about the only thing I do miss.

But then you also have those folks that think the military as a whole is a big waste of time and that anything you do to get yourself ready to be ahead of where you were when you entered can be done without it. Usually this way of thinking comes from pompous asses and folks who never really had to pay a bill a day in their life or before the age of 30. I mean I'm not knocking any of those folks, because if you have it like that then kudos, someone was doing it right. But when you fix your mouth to say something along those lines, then it's my duty to destroy you in the most respectful way possible, because clearly you suck at life. Which I've had to do more times than I really wanted to; secretly it was kind of fun for me to see their reaction. Then you had those folks like me that saw both of the good and the bad, but still chose to go in because the gains were way better than the losses.

Make no mistake about it, I took some major losses while I was in, but I made it out in relatively sound mind and body. Most people like me, with this way of thinking, usually didn't stick around for too long. I would meet them right when they were getting out themselves to pursue that better life we envisioned when we came in. A lot of those folks are still doing well for themselves and I'm happy for them. A few stayed in and they're working the system to their advantage. I still see their messages about how things are either getting worse or are the same; but again, they choose to stay because they know the hustle. There are a couple that got lost in translation and I just hope things work out for them eventually. This is the phase where I was defensive and angry all of the time for those reasons.

These two phases lasted for a combine seven years.

Most of this time was filled with a lot of good and of course a lot of it was filled with bad. But never once did I have any regrets about anything that I did during this stretch of time; simply because I know it made me a better man. It was after this stretch of time, (and the last two years really), that I honed my skills into my creative side of things. This is where my blogging came into play and me writing like a mad man who has awaken after a thirty-year coma. It's here that I found out that the thing that relaxes me the most is the fact that my words come out and relieves thoughts that were holding me down. Writing has become a big part of who I am simply for the benefits of me being able to manage my stress and get things onto paper that I didn't know was in the back of my mind. It keeps me from going off on folks on a daily basis lol.

Even with the benefits that writing has bought me, it's time for me to evolve into the next phase of that part of life. A lot of people don't agree with me taking my break as stated time and time again to me on social media and personal messages. I've addressed this time and time again on here and on social media but folks don't realize that, by extension, writing is my life. Anything that you do in life really well you either outgrow it or you find ways to evolve and make it better for the next step. And as I enter the next phase of my life and I change my priorities, so does my content. I'm not a normal rebranding and go type of person, I need my next move to be more concise and in my vision. This is something that I need to do for me and I'm excited because I leave this era in the past and move towards the future, I just know that there are exciting things on the horizon for me all around.

In time this will all make sense, but until then .. I'll see you around.

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