When A Star Fades ..

I’m not a girl trying to be a star,

I'm just a girl that sings.

- Amy Winehouse

This is one of the few things that I've watched in my life & it instantly makes me sad.

Even when Amy was alive, you just knew that she wasn't the girl who wanted to be famous, or reaching for the stars and the money, she just wanted to be the girl who put her soul into music. What was even worse is that you saw her breaking down right in front of our eyes. I remember vividly thinking to myself one day while I was watching the news, and I saw literally a hundred or so paparazzi trying to get her picture, with her looking visibly upset, and I just said "something is going to happen to her". As sad and depressing as that sounds, you could just tell that the fame and the media blitzing of this young woman was literally eating her alive.

Now I know what a lot of people are saying in regards to her being famous, "well she wanted this life, so she knew what was apart of it" or "she was just being whiny and pretentious, she could've made better life decisions". See these are the type of people I shy away from because they think they know everything, thus they're the most annoying people in the world. I'm a firm believer in the statement "my demons aren't the same as yours", so if that's the case, how could you judge her from what the media portrayed her to be? How can you sit there and pass judgment on a life that you never lived or experienced? How can you become an expert in the matter of never having privacy or a moment where you could just be your true self without someone being there to document it?

Check out the trailer for the movie before you go on here: Amy (2015)

How can you say this young woman deserved to die the way she did?

If you don't know her back story, go read her wiki page and put together the timeline of her life, she was basically famous since the age of 18. Think about when you were 18 years old and in the world for the first time, did you have it all together, did you know who you wanted to be, or who you wanted to marry? I'm about to turn 29 and I'm just now really hitting my stride in who I am, so I know for sure at 18 I didn't have too many cares in the world. So to say that she had the proper influences around here, or the right group of people is a stretch. I'm not one for the public eye, I don't want to be famous, I don't want to be on TV, I like my life private and controlled by me. I learned that the hard way after seeing how people use you for their own personal gain, and how they don't really care about you at the end of the day unless you benefit them. Sadly that's what happened to Amy, she was everyone's source of scrutiny and a media spectacle.

Honestly I don't even know why that was the case to be honest, I mean I know she had an amazing voice and that her songwriting was by none matched at the time. But I mean seriously, she was just a singer, she wasn't a politician, a scientist curing something or even a spiritual figure marching for a cause, she was just a singer. As I get older and I know the in's and out's of the media, I really despise a lot of which they do and these people who they glorify. I'm watching less and less TV and I'm doing more and more of my critical thinking, and the reason I wrote this article is because it bought back memories of seeing this young lady deteriorate right in front of my eyes.

I can relate fully with her because I know that pain of wanting to be loved, the pain of wanting to be accepted for who you are and not what people make you out to be. I know what it's like to literally go places and have to be something that you don't want to be to feel accepted. I mean the proof is there, it is literally there for everyone to see from when she first started and how humble, shy and cute she was, all the way up to her last days where you could visibly tell she had given up. That's the thing that hurts the most here, seeing a person succumb to demons and not care anymore whether they lived or not.

I understand that's a foreign concept to most because they don't know what it's like to be that low in life and have nowhere to go, but I do and let me tell you this, it sucks. People say there is always someone there to talk to and to help you, but when you're in certain situations where your life is literally in danger, only the right person can pull you out of that gutter, and that's something people will never know about. Amy suffered from depression towards the latter part of her life and it was bought on by the money, the fame, and the overwhelming need to put this lady on a pedestal for people to chop back down when they felt the need to.

In eight short years you literally saw the rise of a girl who just wanted to sing, to the downfall of a girl who felt like she had nothing at all. This story is a sobering reminder that regardless of how much money or fame that you have, if you don't have that base of love and care in the form of peace, then even the mightiest of people will fall. I'm really sad that she's gone because I love and adore powerful singers such as herself, and she was one of the very few that could put that together with actual lyrical content that was just as equal. I know that I will be checking out this movie when it comes out, but it's going to be reluctantly, and it's going to be one of the hardest things I will have to do because I don't want to see that kind of pain.

What do you think about the Amy Winehouse situation? Are you going to go see the movie? Leave it in the comments below telling me what you think.

Until next time guys.