So sitting on potential blog posts for a couple of months to a year is nothing new to me, most of my readers know this to be true. But as I was cleaning out my old folder from a thumb drive I found in one of my boxes in storage, I came across a couple of interesting drafts. One draft in particular happened to be a list of goals that I wanted to complete by the latter part of 2011, and here we are in 2015.
With all of that being said, you just knew I was going to blog about where I was at that time versus now, in my current life's state. I think it's kind of cool to actually see a list of tangible goals from such a tumultuous period in my life, and I'm really interested to see if I grew in any sense from that period. Let's see what goals I was thinking about and how it translates into my current state of living:
1. Get Closer To God. | I've definitely gotten closer through experiences, meaning that I've been through some things in the last four years that only he could bring me through, so that part I can say I have. I haven't fulfilled my promise to make church a more constant thing in my life, but I'm working on it. I'm trying to get better in that and by reading passages more. I know a couple of bible quotes but I need to delve deeper than just quotes. So this is a yes and a no here, I know that he's in my life though, so that's a win within itself.
2. Get Closer To My Family. | This is a big fat no, in fact I'm in a worse position than I was in 2011. I've missed several important things, (mostly due to me being away with the military), and most because I've been struggling. At the moment I haven't been home in over a year it seems like and that's pretty bad. I need to do better because you never know what can happen. So this is definitely going to be one of my main focuses in the coming months. Family is everything and I need to stop letting life get me down and out, it's keeping me from seeing them.
3. Become Emotionally Independent. | This is still a work in progress and I'll say that with each day that passes by, I'm getting that much better with it. I never was clingy to begin with, I learned more so how to operate normally in a relationship now. And now that I know what I want, those times where I act out of character are few and far in between now. I'm more so coming into my own and actually putting my knowledge of people and their behaviors to good use. So when I say I'm back to the old me, it's for a good reason, seeing as how I never tripped before. It's just that this time around, I'm being smarter about how I give out my time, attention and love.
4. Learn How To Save Money. | This is an up and down goal, which I'm not too happy about. I've been supporting myself pretty much since 2005, so I've had to teach myself a lot about finances where as I didn't have any kind of example and what not. I did a pretty good job with saving up until that whole spell of unemployment for a good year. I was on track after getting a job and working crazy OT to catch up and get myself good, then I got into yet another car accident, with a good old concussion and subsequent severe nasal infection which resulted in me going to the hospital to make sure I don't die and what not for about a good week.
That resulted in a hefty copay, due to some circumstances with health coverage not being too clear, thanks VA. But for the most part I'm getting better with it because I have some goals that I want to accomplish within the next year and two that requires money, and I'm starting to understand the value of saving money. This isn't a completely lost goal because of said situations, but at the same time it's not a claimed goal because I don't have any evidence of being able to save like how I want to.
5. Stop Having Random Sex. | This is something that I'm proud to say I've accomplished lol. Now I'm not one to talk about my sex life at all, but I was your typical young person and I was just humping like a rabbit at times from 2008 to 2011. I mean when I got a girlfriend I really humped like a little rabbit, but that's because we were young. So as I've gotten older, (and my fear of having a child has increased), I've learned to slow my role. Plus I've decided that I save some gas for the tank and leave a little for my next girlfriend. But other than that, this is one thing that I'm proud to say that I've gotten my life all the way together on.
6. Stop Drinking. | I think this was a more of a gradual decline than a straight up stoppage in use on my part. I don't drink at all now, but it definitely wasn't a sudden stop, I was drinking a lot when I got out of the military, and after I decided to change my life around, I just naturally stopped. That's pretty funny when you think about it because anyone who has been to where I currently live will see liquor bottles sitting on my counter, which serves as a mini bar. That happens to belong to my roommate, but one would assume that I partake in a beverage at least randomly, which isn't the case. I last took a shot of liquor around the time I was sick a couple of months ago, but that's because I wanted my throat to stop acting like it was trying to kill me lol. But in comparison from then to now, it's definitely a goal that came true.
7. Stop Cursing. | Next question, sike I'm just kidding lol. But really I've done light years better than where I was at the time. The main reason I put this one down was because of the culture the military had when it came to that. Its pretty much the first language. Now that I'm out of the military and back in the real world, it's virtually non existent. I mean I could work on it if I tried, but for the most part it's regulated to just cussing around friends and what not. I work in corporate settings, so getting fired isn't something that I want to do lol. I would say this one is a success.
8. Start Eating Better. | This is a fail because I'm always on the go and I rarely have time to sit down and cook something proper, plus I don't have the discipline to buy something healthy when I do go out. I'm getting older so the importance of eating right is starting to become an even greater reason for my long term health goals. I do have to lose weight to alleviate some of this pain my back and knees are causing me. But this coincides with number 9 on this list, so once I start doing that, I will start doing this.
9. Workout More. | This is definitely a no because I've been on the run and not stable the last four years. There was that stretch during Iraq and after Iraq I was hitting it hard, but the daily grind of being a cook in the military kicked back in and I was once again too tired to do anything other than go to work and sleep. I didn't think I would say this but I miss Iraq for the soul fact that I was happy when I was in the gym working out and sweating away all of my frustrations. This is something I plan on rectifying soon seeing as how I start my journey to benching 400lbs soon.
10. Explore The World. | Another thing that I haven't done due to a lack of time and whatever else I had going on. I had plans to do things but my life changed between deployment in 2011 and getting out of the military in 2013, so I had to plan for both of those events. Now that I'm starting to find some stable ground I'm going to be able to actually get up and get out and see somethings that this world has to offer, and that makes me excited.
I've noticed that a lot of these things that I haven't done is a direct result of me not having time to do them, and that's bad. I'm great at scheduling things and making plans to complete tasks, but when it comes to my own personal development I'm not. I need to stop being so involved with others lives and be involved in my own and maybe, just maybe, my life will change how I want it to. I know better than anyone that not enough time devoted to self will cause anyone to have a breakdown and not be able to live the life that they want. It's pretty dope that I found this list while I'm in this stage of my life where I'm actively working on myself, puts things in perspective.
What are some things that you look
back on now and see yourself doing really well with or really bad with? I'm
interested in hearing about them, leave it in the comments below.
Until next time guys!
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