Your Favorite Blogger's Favorite Blogger

Here I was writing this blog post that I felt I HAD to write and that I had to get off my chest. That's my thing, I write blog posts that either come from the heart or thoughts in my head that I wonder about. When it comes to my reaction pieces it's all about how I feel so I rarely rely on research or second opinions. I thought it was perfect blog that let everyone know that I was down but by no means counted out. I did my usual not read it and I almost posted it but something told me to get a second pair of eyes on it.

So that's what I did, I got Z from Dear Queens to look it over for me and like the awesome person that she is, she basically told me that I was being a brat lol. For a brief moment I stepped out of myself and stooped to a level that I didn't need to go to. Now that I look back and read what I wrote on, I realized that I went off on a tangent and slammed a process because I felt overlooked.

And for what?

Well because I'm human and my feelings were hurt. That pains me to admit out loud, but it's necessary that I do because it puts things in perspective when you admit wrongdoings. For a brief second I second guessed myself as to why I was doing something I loved, why I wasn't where I thought I should be and why I was having the feeling of being stagnant. It took me awhile to realize that these feelings are very valid and that I needed to feel them consciously so that I could police myself and fix what was going on.

So with the advice of Alyx from Black Is The New Black, I took a break.

I was still posting regularly but I stepped completely away from social media and just hid out at home without really talking to anyone. Then came my birthday and I what snapped me out were all the conversations from people that I haven't talked to in awhile. It wasn't anything deep or riveting, it was just good old fashion laughs and memories that made me realize that I'm ok. I was feeling like no one was noticing what I was doing and that I was just talking for the sake of talking when in reality I wasn't.

God basically put all of the people in my life to make me feel like a million bucks because I make them feel like a million bucks. A lot of them talked about my blog in depth and specific posts which lets me know that at the end of the day the people that I care about the most in this world, knows that I'm trying my best at something that I want to succeed badly at. When I was feeling the lowest, they came through in the clutch and made me realize that I'm on the right path towards the goals that I set. I'm not where I want to be, where I need to be, or where I feel I should be.

I'm right where I need to be.

I'm glad that I work behind the scenes with so many bloggers, not with their blog or their writing, but with the actual blogger. I had a talk with one of my fellow bloggers, (who wants to remain nameless), and they basically told me that I push them to be a better person and in turn that makes them push out better content. When I hear things like that I never really put too much stock into it because I don't like taking credit for something the person actually achieves. Nor am I the person who puts each leg in their pants and live their life in a manner which brings about change for them.

No, I'm just the guy that gave them a swift kick in the butt when they needed one.

And in this instance when I was feeling down and I was out, I was reminded by three bloggers what I need to do to stay me because they know who I am as a person. So in turn they know who I am as a blogger because I work so hard to be the same person. My DM's are filled with other bloggers who are or have struggled at some point and I always remind them of the simple things that will get them ahead because we all need that person in our lives that understands what we are going through and gives us sound advice.

The title of this blog came from a fellow blogger and when I posted the tweet as a joke many cosigned it. I may have not said anything on the timeline about it, but that really made me happy to know that those blogger, even the ones I've had the least interaction with, feel that way about me. I'm a very humble person for a reason, so when I see something like that or a person tells me something like that, I genuinely feel happiness and pride because that's just how I'm wired.

To be mentioned by all the wonderful hardworking bloggers that put in the time, the blood, the sweat and the tears is the greatest award that I could ever receive.

It goes right along with the notion of me wanting to be the Nas of the blog game. Respected by my peers and respected by purest, and that makes everything okay for me.

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